Yeah, the 7" of fluffy snow at my house today is getting sleeted/rained into, but it will make for a good start to a base in the woods. Everyone is a little bummed about the lack of snow so far. What to do? I'm gonna tell you a few of the strangest/funniest ski class stories I've been a part of:
1) Late January, freezing cold, blower wind puts the top of the hill on wind hold. Down to the beginner area I go. I'm given a class of 8 teenage Amish girls who really want to learn how to ski. Great class, but I had a little trouble concentrating on the lesson plan because these girls were all wearing long, ankle length skirts. No, I'm not a dirty old man, but it was hard to keep a straight face when the wind kicked up and blew all of these skirts up over the girls heads. I mean up over their heads, couldn't see a thing, especially not their bare legs and white bloomies!
2) Late November, kind of a dreary day, I'm given a class of Chinese men who are wearing suits and ties in addition to their ski boots and skis. These guys didn't speak a word of English either. So, the class consisted of me pointing to my eye (meaning watch what I do and do it), then demoing a maneuver. It was funny because it worked so well and these guys were bombing the beginner area in 2 hours making good linked turns. I go back to line up and the wise guy who assigned me the class asks sarcastically "How did that go?". As I'm about to say "Great", these Chinese guys ski up and excitedly hand me a $100 tip in front of everyone. Guess who winds up teaching non-English speaking classes the rest of the season?
3) Finally, a teaching clinic with one of those political animals one finds in every ski school. Has all the certifications and connections, but I don't think he skis all that well. Talks alot, and loves to stop on the edge of trails and have the class remove one ski to demo something, who knows what. I'm getting cold and bored and had the audacity to ask when we would ski a little bit. As this "clinician" is getting up in my face to make another non-point, the ski he took off got bored and decided to ski down by itself. He then demonstrated how NOT to ski on one ski.
Hope nobody was offended by any of this, it's all meant in good fun. Keep smiling and think snow!
Gravity-it's not just a good idea, it's the law!